Are you a fan or a follower?

I know, it's a weird question and you are probably wondering where it is coming from. 

I just finished this great book titled "Not a Fan." by Kyle Idleman.  Becoming a completely committed follower of Jesus.

Now you may be saying to yourself:  I'm a follower.  I accepted Jesus into my heart as my Savior on this date_____.  I remember where I was and what I was doing.  But have you ever wondered  what the difference between being a Fan of Jesus is as compared to being a Follower of Jesus. 

As I read this book I felt myself start to become humbled and little embarrassed.  There are many times in my life where I would have been considered more of Fan than a Follower.  There are even days when this holds true.  So, what you may ask is the distinction?

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the word Fan as "an enthusiastic admirer."  So what is wrong with that?  Well, there may be several people you admire:  parents, a teacher, a Pastor, sports figures, musical recording artists, movie stars...... and the list goes on and on.  You may have read books about them, know their birthdays, favorite colors, and for a time you may even pattern your life after them.  But it is a fad that comes and goes, or you can go long periods of time without talking to them or knowing how they are.  The same can go for Jesus.

You may have a "fish" symbol on your car, wear a cross, go to church, pass all the tests in school.  You may even be able to quote scripture.  Here is where the defining line comes:  does your commitment to Jesus shape the person you are, the people you spend the most time with, how you conduct yourself at work.  Is Jesus intertwined in every part of your life?  Or, is He only there when times are good, or when you need something, or the answer to the question on a questionnaire.  When He doesn't answer your prayer the way you wanted or expected, or that loved one left you, or even worse died?  Or when everything is going well so you forget about Him?  Or maybe you pick and choose the parts of the Bible you like and use the other as slight guidelines for your life?

To be a committed follower you need to be "IN" relationship with Jesus everyday.  You need to spend real time with Him.  You have to trust that "He's got your back" and knows what is best for you.  Proverbs 3:5 says: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will lead you in right paths."  That means trust Him with your family, your prodigal child, your marriage, your finances, your job, your friendships, with EVERYTHING!  We have to remember He has a plan that was set forth before we were created.  He says that in Jeremiah 29:11.  In Isaiah He states that he knit us in our mother's womb.  He holds us in the palm of His hand.  All throughout scripture we are told that He Loves Us.  He loves us more than our parents, our friends, our children, our spouse.  In Romans 8:28 we are told: "That everything works out for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." 

God never promised us our lives would be easy, but He did promise to always be with us.  He tells us again and again in statements like: "I am sending you out as lambs among wolves" or "if people hate you, persecute you, scoff at you, remember they hated me first."  It's a war zone out there for the true follower.  You can loose family and friends for it.  In some countries they still persecute and execute true followers. 

If you are not already a follower you may wonder "why, give me a good reason?"  Here is one reason:   Because our time here in this world is finite, measured in days, weeks, months, years.  Our eternity is infinite, as quoted by Buzz Lightyear in "Toy Story":  To infinity and beyond.  If Heaven is eternity in the presence of God, then Hell is eternity in the absence of God.  Eternal darkness, pain, suffering, hunger, and unquenchable thirst.  To me, that is not a pretty picture.  Here is another reason; and this one is personal.  I know what God has done for me, how he filled the God-shaped hole in my heart, how He changed my perception of circumstances that occur. 

After I accepted God nothing magical happened in my life to make it perfect.  If you have read my other blogs you will see the hard times I have had.  I have had close friends die when I was in high school, I have seen friends who have lost infant and young children.  Both of my parents are in Heaven now with my Savior.  I have suffered victimization.  I have emotional scars that have run deep.  I suffer from depression.  Here is the thing though.  Having a relationship with God through my faith in Jesus Christ has made all those things more bearable.  He has been the my light in the darkness, my comfort during pain.  He has made me new and given me a hope.

Am I always a good follower?  Absolutely not.  I am a disobedient child who wants what they want, when they want it.  I can be egocentric, hurtful, and selfish.  But my God knows that and loves me inspite of my black heart.  Nothing can separate me from God's love. 

I leave with you this question:  Are you a fan or a follower?  If not, what are you gonna do to make the change?

On the Anniversary of Roe v. Wade

As I sit here at my kitchen table I am pondering a link I read.  It was an article found today about the Anniversary of Roe v. Wade.  The opening paragraph talks about how President Obama and Company were celebrating today.  I was appalled.

What is there really to celebrate?  Are they celebrating the deaths of millions of unborn children?  Are they celebrating the women who have died from the procedure.  Are they celebrating the millions of women who are left with emotional and mental scars from the guilt they feel they must carry because of a decision they made.

Some say they are celebrating a "Woman's Right to Choose." 

I get that not every woman who becomes pregnant chose that option.  Some were raped by a date, a relative, or a stranger.  For some, it is because to not end the pregnancy would mean the woman would die.  But come on.....let's be brutally honest.  A great majority of the women walking into abortion clinics in the U.S. are ending an unwanted or inconvenient pregnancy.  They made a choice to have intimate relations with someone, and whoops.......now they are pregnant.  Some even end up using this as a form of birth control. 

Then the "pro-choice" advocates say that only old men and women who have had their abortions already are the bulk of what make up "pro-lifers".  I cannot speak to the first group, but I am part of the second.

It all happened when I was 18 years old.  I was raped.  It was an acquaintance.  I was a naive 18 year old.  Maybe I should have seen it coming.  I have been told time and again that it was not my fault.  It took me many years to believe it, and many past that to forgive myself for the decision I made.

I lived with the emotional and mental scars that women can carry away from that experience.  I thought myself no better than a vicious murderer.  Did I choose to become pregnant?  No, in fact it was my first introduction to sex.  I felt dirty, slimy, unworthy, and like an outcast.  I was embarrassed and ashamed.  I told no one about the incident.  I became withdrawn and began having nightmares.  Guess what?  Six weeks later I find myself pregnant.  In my mind I went against everything I was raised to believe:  no relations out of wedlock, no children out of wedlock.

I called a friend.  She drove me to the nearest Planned Parenthood.  I filled out all the necessary forms, answered all the necessary questions correctly, and terminated my pregnancy.  I slept at my friends house all day, and went home after dinner, acting as if nothing happened.  But I hated myself.

Even though I was a believer, I had forgotten about God's free gift of grace.  I had forgotten that he could lift this burden.  I had forgotten to ask for forgiveness.  At the time I did not believe I should be forgiven.  That enlightenmint would come 10 years later.

On a couples marriage weekend in July of 1997 it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I was listening to a testimony from a couple about Communication.  This of course was aimed towards marriage, but it also relates directly to our Communication with God.   You know:  Prayer!

It was then I decided to ask God for forgiveness.  Guess what?  A huge weight was lifted from my shoulders;  just like that.  That is the velocity of God's love and grace.  0 to 60 in under a microsecond.  Better than Ferrari, Lambourghini, and Maserati offer.  Then I asked forgiveness from my unborn baby. 

All throughout scripture God tells us of his unconditional love and forgiveness.  Matthew 11: 28 says:  "Come to me all you who are weary and heavily burdened, and I will give you rest."  Jesus did not just say that for effect.  He meant it.  On the cross Jesus says:  "Forgive them Father, they know not what they are doing", Luke 23:34.  Nothing can separate the believer from God's love.  Romans 8: 38-39 says:  "No power on earth or heaven can separate us from God's love. Not our sin, not any authority, not any spiritual force. God's love is unshakable and can always be relied upon."   Did you read that last sentence?  This amazes me:  unshakable and can always be relied upon.  ALWAYS!  Not sometimes, not usually, not in certain instances or circumstances, but ALWAYS! 

I made a mistake.  One that was life-changing.  One that I regret to this day.  I wish my friend would have stopped me.  I wish that an organization called Pregnancy Solutions and Services, a ministry my church partners with, would have been there to minister to me. 

So on this Anniversary of Roe v. Wade, I ask again:  What are they celebrating?